Friday 18 April 2014

Jellied Babies (late 1970s)

This week's theme of human consumption continues with this popular Jellied Babies confectionery packaging from the late 1970s.

It's that time of the year when people tear unborn offspring away from incarcerated, drugged, distraught adults, paint them lurid colours, as if to mock them, then devour the helpless, would-be babies in front of the tormented parents. It's a bit like an annual jolly pogrom.

However, in the spirit of fairness, people in Scarfolk believed that chickens should not be the only creatures to lose their young during the festive spring period. Rabbit and otter eggs were also frequently consumed in Scarfolk, and human orphans in aspic were a particular favourite. Jellied Babies went into production after the council realised that the cost of foster care was prohibitive, especially because funds were needed for more beneficial things, such as quality garden furniture for the second homes of politicians.

In general, child donation can actually be financially lucrative. For example, when God sacrificed his own child for the good of society, he made sure he got a cut of the publishing and merchandising rights.

Happy Ä’ostre from Scarfolk Council.
Click to enlarge
If you have any unwanted children please write to: KiddyKomestibles Ltd, Scarfolk Industrial Park, SC1 6FG to arrange for a FREE pick up.


  1. Is Scarfolk has a football club?

  2. Replies
    1. Oleaginous Aquifer Interface21 November 2014 at 19:27

      No, its parents were born out of wedlock and so was it; it's thus a bi-stard and not to be trusted.

  3. No rabbits and otters are mammals. they do not lay eggs.

    1. You've never seen otters lay eggs. It's not the same.

    2. What are platypuses then? Or is it platypi?

    3. Playpuses are not the only mammals to lay eggs. Seriously, Echidna you not!

  4. The tears are collected and refined for a tincture of atrophy