Wednesday 31 May 2017

Police Interrogation Safewords

Almost everybody endured police interrogations at some point during the 1970s. They were so frequent that most families had a packed bag by the front door (people were expected to bring a spare change of underwear and their own first-aid supplies).

If by chance all members of a family were summoned together, they might make a day of it, have a picnic in the prison facility's Garden of Incorruptibility and watch the interrogation of their loved ones on big monitors. Laugh tracks were included to minimise distress.

While the security services were openly proud of their slogans such as "we promise to raise a glass to those who don't confess", if a detainee did suffer irreversible psychological or physical damage as a result of their interrogation, the family was awarded a £5 book token and a potted cactus as compensation.

More about Scarfolk Security Services.


  1. We lived in fear (and hope) of the dreaded security police known in underground circles as covefefe...

  2. We lived in fear (and hope) of the dreaded security police known in underground circles as covefefe...

  3. Ah, the good ol' times... when adults payed attention to us... I remember when were were singing in choral chant "the torture... the torture never sucks". Some of us had hard time trying to hide that uncertain glaze in their eye. I still think it wasn't fair : as adults, we have to stay at the same language level in any occasion. Torture programs for children like "See-truth Glass Magic", "Know your Truth", "Spit it quick", "Kids Don't Kid", "Don't Bull***t Me" or "See that Cactus?" are too often the place were proficiency English slips to gross langage. We are the reference and we shouldn't forget that when the heat goes on. I admit that keeping an eye on the truth is sometimes hard when you're focused on manual skills. And all those judges who have decent work hours and still have hard time finding the logic between different sessions cassettes contents... Once again, it's our responsabilty to explain how logic works. When they are tighed in their bed in waiting lofts, kids can take a look at flyers like "Feel like a ball ? Stay logical" or "Kicks in butts don't turn kids nuts", "Not Hum, Hammer, H.A.M.M.E.R." We had to remove all the information posters cause they were repeating the lines over and over again. The new SSS logo had bad consequences too, not the meaning but the sound that the guests spelled : it made them spoiled their pants, but it is embarrassing to talk about the pre-safeword times. Anyway... urine is sterile and could change the average look of the instruments.

  4. And this is what we''l return to if Corbyn Monoxide gets his British Democratic Republic.